Finding Never - C.M. Stunich Well what can I say other than it took me a couple days to process things? This book reaches deep, people. It grabs you heart and squeezes until you literally ache for the characters. It's beautiful and horrible at the same time. We get to meet Never's family and Noah and wasn't that just special? The homecoming was in parts really sweet and so unrelentingly sad it brought tears to my eyes. Noah is a beautiful soul and readers love him for not only loving Never, but for his poetry. We see more of it in this book and it is so heartbreaking. I really want a Happily Ever After for him. Just so you get it, just so you get him and the weight of his love for Never, here is something he wrote. It made my Grinch heart grow!

"Buried by blood, Gasping; as if air could be bought with whispers and prayers.
I am drowning; Here it is, my final plea.
Just remember, I won't repeat it, so pay attention; Write it down.
I am bleeding and in my own blood, I am drowning.
I didn't know how hard it would hit me when my lungs breathed it in.
I didn't know how sad I would feel as I watched my own vision, dimming.
I didn't realize how much I would miss you in that last moment and how much I would cry.
I cried and the tears mixed with the blood and I couldn't see them because red filled my vision and then I was blind and I cried no more and the bleeding stopped; It stopped when my heart stopped; My heart, The one broken by you, could only have been broken by you, and I was happy because I could never bleed again." (Kindle loc: 2153)

Jesus Christ. I need a minute... That kind of pain transcends the fact that he is a fictional character, it transcends the fact that it didn't happen to us. The kind of pain is so consuming it drowns everyone in it, even if it's just for a moment. AND the scene that this poem is in, dear LAWD, I think this author likes to punch us in the grief bone. That being said, healing comes with grief and there was a lot of that in this book too. Never moves on with her sisters, is resolved about her mother, says goodbye to Never Regali and completely embraces who she is now. But because all of this, even though it's messy as HELL, it would be too neatly wrapped up so WE GET BOMBS DROPPED ON US!!! Not one, people, oh no, no, no, no, no! Two bombs! Two of these babies that literally filled me with so much anxiety I almost went Hulk! Smash! on my kindle. I am so sorry, kindle. You deserve so much better. I blame C.M. Stunich.

This book was everything I was expecting and everything I wasn't. I would HIGHLY recommend this series and now I will be waiting oh so impatiently until March 2nd for book three. Thank God she's a fast writer because if we had to wait longer after this ending, I would be soooooo GRRRRR! Go read! Join me in the wait and I will see you guys in March!!

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